You are aware that we only have so much time in this gift called Life right?
Are you wasting your time not being happy, only worrying about making others happy instead?
...Or are you making the most of your own happiness?
To Learn The 5 Things You Need To Do Right Now To Make Sure You're Valuing Yourself And Role Modelling To Your Child Properly
You do know your happiness is valuable right? I certainly hope so.
If you're anything like me, then you've been undermining the value of your own happiness here on Earth. It is so easy to forget that we are each of us important. Just as important as those who we look up to...and yet, we tend to treat our mentors and loved ones better than we treat ourselves.
Are you guilty of this? Is your child?
Just like every other life skill, we are role modelling to our children how they are expected to treat themselves. When we put ourselves last...we cannot be surprised when our kids grow up and end up putting themselves last too!
If you were raised like I was, then you were probably taught to always put others interests ahead of your own....and that's a very nice idea...but it has some very BAD outcomes!
Now, I'm not talking about being selfish, about always thinking of our own needs and wants first before anyone else, or about forgetting the needs and wants of others...
...what I'm saying here, is that we forget to take care of ourselves and that is NOT a healthy role model for our kiddos.
Can you remember the last time you skipped something important to you just so you would make sure that something that was important to someone else got taken care of instead?
Why did you do it?
Because you didn't feel your wants or needs were as important as theirs?
No, that's probably NOT what your intentions were. You weren't trying to put yourself down, belittling yourself for their benefit....nope...most likely you just felt a deep desire to please them.
That's usually what it boils down to. We put others first because we ultimately want them to be happy with us.
Can you see the irony of that?
We want them to be happy with us in order for ourselves to be happy.
Talk about going the long way round the bend. Why not just skip right to 'be happy with ourselves' and guess what?
When we are happy with ourselves...the side effect is that we actually end up making those who we wish to please...happy! Just by being happy ourselves!
Think about it.
Do you like being around unhappy people? Stressed people?
NOPE. I would bet anything that you would probably try your best to AVOID that right?
Well, when we put ourselves LAST, guess what?
We BECOME those unhappy, stressed people and you know what that means?
YUP, you guessed it! The people we want so desperately probably would do anything to avoid being around our negative energy.
Okay, so that didn't work! YIKES!!!
But won't people think we're awfully selfish if we think about our own needs and wants before theirs?
But MOST LIKELY they won't. Why?
Because, let's be honest here...who do you think about most often?
Yup! You guessed it. YOU!
And that's a GOOD thing, a VERY GOOD thing....because that also means that THEY think about THEMSELVES most of the time...
....which means that they probably don't even spend much time at all thinking about us!
I heard a saying once that I love to live by. I can't remember who said it though, sorry about that.
"What you think about me is none of my business. What I think about you is none of your business."
It's SOOOO true!
We are ALL of us ALLOWED to think whatever we want to think. That's the gift we got when we were given our own minds. We can think about whatever we want to. And it's all our own. Our thoughts are NOT the property of anyone else.
Which also means, that what others are thinking is NOT our business. They are allowed to think whatever they want to think and it's not our job to think for them.
Do you understand what that means? It means FREEDOM is yours!
You can now, let others worry about themselves, and be free to be the best role model you can be. Love yourself, think of yourself, your needs, your wants first. Take good care of yourself...make yourself HAPPY....TRULY HAPPY...and the rest falls beautifully in place.
Let me give you some examples that you can use:
Eat your cake!
- You are allowed to take the largest piece of cake! YUP, that's right, you are! You are also allowed to give that biggest piece of cake to someone else because it feels good. When you do that you are still feeding what is best for you...that good feeling you get for giving that bigger piece away will feel MUCH better than the extra calories probably would have anyway right?
The point here is that you are absolutely allowed to do either scenario. There is NO right or wrong here.
Think about it. If you took the larger piece on purpose to hurt someone else...then that would give you a bad feeling...so no reward for you. But if you take it simply because you would enjoy it and you have no bad feelings of intention for anyone else, then they will also be just as happy with a slightly smaller piece, and will most likely not even notice you took the bigger one!
We are all so concerned about what others think about us, but in reality the others don't actually think much about you anyway, they are too busy thinking about themselves and worrying about what others are thinking about them!
Be FREE! Get yourself out of the cycle.
Then you will raise kids who become happy self-fulfilled adults who are not reliant on the happiness of others to make themselves happy but just enjoy making others happy because they already feel tremendous joy themselves and wish to share that wonderful feeling with others.
Click Here To Learn The 5 Things You Need To Do Right Now To Make Sure You're Valuing Yourself And Role Modelling To Your Child Properly:
(You'll also get to have a sneak peek at some tools that I personally use to make sure I'm constantly reminded of my own value.)
Remember to be kind to yourself. You matter. You are valuable. I'm sure you are setting an amazing example to your child already but are you making sure they see you valuing yourself too? Will your child spend the rest of their lives worrying about making others happy or knowing how others will be happy when they are?
Cheers…Amanda van der Gulik…Excited Life Enthusiast! ;o)
P.S. Click Here To Learn The 5 Things You Need To Do Right Now To Make Sure You're Valuing Yourself And Role Modelling To Your Child Properly:
Amanda uses story-telling to teach children and teens the fundamentals of cash so your kid will learn these in a fun and memorable way, without feeling like they're being TOLD what to do! Amanda has been a special guest on Radio Disney, featured in The Costco Connections Magazine both in Canada and the USA and on numerous parenting shows around the globe. For a short time, Amanda is giving away
7 FREE Gifts, including "50 Money Making Ideas for Children and Teens" and "Allowance Secrets: To Give or Not to Give?"
Visit www.TeachingChildrenAboutMoney.com, to grab your free gifts before they go away!