Encouragement
by Lisa McKenzie

A focus when talking about encouragement is the Power of Unity.  Unity means that we are all in this together.  The purpose is to create a sense of belonging, with the value of interdependence.  Interdependence includes the values of caring, kindness, and helpfulness.  Relationships are important including contributing to the welfare of all others. 
A focus on unity is a way to build a sense of self-worth or self-esteem.  How people “see” others is a way to define who they themselves are.  Sometimes praise can be discouraging instead of encouraging.  Praise that is effective involves describing and does not include any judgment.  It’s important for us to remember that we are all on this journey together. 

Science and physics used to view the universe in a mechanical way and we were viewed as separate from each other.  The key to be able to succeed and survive is with the use of control and dominating over each other.  Rewards are used to reinforce behavior.  Consequences are viewed as ways to eliminate inappropriate conduct.  People are expected to comply in order to try to get change to happen.  Compliance is attempted in this way:  The accountability of schools is attacked by society.  The schools then attack the accountability of parents.  Next the parents attack the accountability of teachers.  Then children are viewed as making poor choices, hence the wisdom of children is attacked by teachers.  This is still happening in schools today.

Einstein defined unity as the basic nature of humans that needs to be supported.  Everything in the universe is interconnected.  There is no separate self and we are all made of energy connecting us together.  With this new view of modern physics we are asked to go beyond what we can perceive with our five senses.  How we perceive an event or our world is a choice that we have the ability to make.  It is not based on facts.

With this new way of perceiving our world, we are asked to shift classroom management to a way of cooperation instead of competition.  Cooperation is the cornerstone of evolution.  It is necessary for schools and classrooms to embrace a sense of community.  School climate needs to be positive to promote a feeling of self-worth, importance, and a sense of belonging.

What creates the climate and heart of the learning environment is the routines and rituals.  Routines assist children to know what will happen next.  Rituals are ways to create a feeling of connection, a sense of togetherness and unity.  Use of rituals helps children to maintain a feeling of calm.  Examples of rituals are ‘Welcoming a new child ritual’ and ‘Goodbye ritual’. 

It’s important for children to believe that they contribute in a meaningful to the connectedness of the school.  All children need to have an opportunity to contribute in some way or ways to other people or children.  Some activities to use to assist children to feel like they are contributing include:  classroom jobs for each child that are meaningful, service projects, and children feeling that their contributions are noticed.  Every child needs to have a job.  Examples of children’s verbal statements to let children know that they are contributing, that they are being kind to others, and to notice their strengths.

How do you answer the question, ‘Who am I?’  Once again, the answer relates to unity.  Everyone believes that they are worthy or unworthy based on their own perception of themselves and how they interact with others.  Self esteem is created moment by moment in how we view or ‘see’ other people.  If we see that other people are inadequate and lacking, then we feel inadequate about ourselves.  Then we feel separate from others.  Those who feel separate tend to isolate themselves from others.  They don’t feel like they fit in. 

Instead of teaching children how to perceive others in relation to their misbehavior, we can teach children that inappropriate behavior is a call for help from that child (or adult).  Schools focus on competition with the idea that children who are special get rewards, the idea that they are getting something.  Instead we can focus on the idea that everyone is unique and we are all here to connect as well as assisting others to connect.

Adults have a tendency to judge instead of describe.  It is necessary to see what someone is doing, then describe it with excitement.  If you use judging too often with a child, the child will grow into a child with anxiety who’s always wondering if they are doing something the wrong way.  Judgment is conditional.  Encouragement is about accepting children for who they are.  Acceptance notices and describes behavior or actions that exist.  Acceptance is unconditional, that makes no demands.  When children make mistakes or inappropriate choices, they need encouragement to assist them in solving their own problems.  Encouragement is hope.  With encouragement, individuals develop self control. 
Lisa McKenzie is a teacher with an Arizona state certification for Kindergarten through 8th grade.  Lisa has many years of experience teaching many different ages and grades, from toddlers through high school.  She enjoys working and interacting with children of all age groups.  Lisa believes that building a foundation of values from an early age and continuing an ongoing practice of these values improves the ability to learn as well as creating a strong basis in which to live a fulfilling and enriched life.  Lisa also teaches skills for parents and adults in order to positively respond to children instead of reacting.

lmckenzieatpeace@msn.com

602-579-9461